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Expectation vs Reality.
It's a very common concept, one that forms part of our daily lives. We all have certain expectations before we start a journey and at times, some of these expectations can be met. But the reality most of the time is that, things never really turn out how we first anticipated them to be. We might find ourselves completely underwhelmed, overwhelmed or in a state of emotions we wouldn't even have considered before.
University was like that for me. Except my reality included all three results. There were the moments I found quite underwhelming and the many many moments I was overwhelmed in my four year journey. Then there were those moments that I just didn't know what to feel. You know, when so many things are happening around you and you find yourself dissociating from your situation. Which is why a lot of the time, I refer to my university journey as being a rollercoaster.
And fun fact: I absolutely hate rollercoasters.
It's funny that, despite my disdain for them, life itself seems to be a rollercoaster with so many twists and turns. The difference being that, probably unlike the mechanical ones, you can actually learn so many things from this rollercoaster called life. And with the stage of my life called university, I certainly picked up quite a few lessons.
1. Academics
One of the main things I think university did was humble me in terms of my academics. I have always been a top student since I could remember, with my fair share of awards and recognitions. But things really took a turn once I started my degree. The girl that once strived for high marks was now trying to do her best to get a passing grade. I had expected to carry on my streak of academic excellence, and don't get me wrong, it was nowhere near an impossible feat. However I clearly underestimated how difficult and demanding it would be.
It didn't help that my degree programme turned out to be way more different than I had expected. I found myself not being as interested or as passionate in many aspects of my programme in a way that I could see many of my course-mates were. And that, coupled with academic pressures, led to me not putting my all in at certain times.
But honestly, if you put in enough work and set your mind towards achieving certain academic goals in uni, you can make it. Just don't underestimate how much hard work will actually be required because university is much more different than high school.
2. Social Life
I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who expected my university life to be similar to all those movies I watched growing up. It didn't help that a lot of them were American movies, and their portrayal of university life was probably in many ways different to that of the UK's. All in all, I expected university to be the stage in my life where I would spread my social wings and fly. Not necessarily all the partying and drinking, but joining societies, trying new stuff and meeting new people.
And even though I did join a society or two and made some amazing friends, it really wasn't to a level that I would have liked. I learnt that being in uni doesn't automatically make you a social butterfly; you actually have to put in the work to do that. You know, stepping out of your comfort zone, making the effort to take on new challenges and actually speak to people. All the things that might seem easier for an extrovert compared to an introvert such as myself.
3. Spiritual Life
One thing I learned was that university is one stage where you need to make that conscious decision to either go against everything you were brought up with or to stand firm in the faith you have received. And boy, will there be trials and tests of your faith. I don't think I expected just how testing it would be and the types of struggles I would face.
Without that community of believers I thankfully found myself surrounded by, I honestly might have come out of university a different person. And not in a good way. The Bible says we should surround ourselves with good company (Psalm 1; 1 Corinthians 15:33) and that we should be careful not to overestimate how strong we are in our standing with God.
More precisely, it says:
So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall! ~ 1 Corinthians 10:12 (NIV)
Don't think that you are above temptation or that you are too holy to slip up. Rather than trusting in your own capabilities, trust in God's Holy Spirit to strengthen you especially in difficult moments and times of struggles.
4. Relationships
I will absolutely admit, the extremely imaginative part of me, heavily influenced by books and movies, dreamed of finding my Mr Right in university. You know, like in those romcoms that seem to always have a happy ending?
Yes well, I realised that in order for that to even happen, I actually had to put myself out there. And honestly, being me, I would have rather spent my evenings binging a new KDrama than actually going out to meet people. Another side of me also realised that, being in university didn't automatically make me ready for a serious relationship with someone. It required a mental and emotional capacity that I honestly couldn't afford to give up during these four years of uni. And still maybe even now.
But another thing I learned is that on a personal level, I need to learn how to love God first and love myself before anyone else. And until I really learn how to do those two, all other 'romantic' relationships can take a back seat. And besides, I trust that God's timing is the perfect timing. So why rush into something that will only end in uncertainty and confusion when God has a perfect plan/person for my life?
So these are four areas of my university life that didn't seem at all like how I initially expected. I think understanding that not everything can or will meet our expectations gives us enough room to grow and learn throughout whatever journey we're on. Even in this next stage of my life, I know I will have some assumptions and beliefs that will ultimately be nothing like I am anticipating. But reality has a way of opening our eyes and helping us be better versions of ourselves, through all of the low and high points of our lives. It's up to us to learn the lessons or stay in our bubble of perfect expectations.
Hope you enjoyed the read! Are there any expectations you had when you first started uni? Were they met? And for those who are yet to start, what are some of your thoughts or assumptions about uni life? Let us know in the comments below. You can also email/message me on social media. I'd love to hear from you! As always, join the EuniqueBlogs fam if you haven't already, as well as our mailing list, by subscribing to the blog to stay up to date with the latest releases.
Wishing you all a wonderful day/week!
And a huge well done to all those who have received/are receiving result this week and in the weeks to come!
Stay blessed and stay a blessing.
